Body, Emotion & Regulation

In Buddhist psychology, the root of suffering is often described as grasping  - the clinging to what we want, the resistance to what we don’t, and the struggle to control what is inherently impermanent. As Bhikkhu Bodhi (2000) explains, suffering arises not simply from pain itself, but from our relationship  to pain, our mental tightening around it. This ancient insight feels as true today as ever. Whether we’re clinging to a relationship, an identity, a belief, or a feeling,

Why Is Anxiety Worse at Night? Many people find that anxiety intensifies at night; just as the world quiets down, the mind grows louder. Without the distractions of the day, our thoughts can spiral, often toward fear, regret, or uncertainty. This experience isn’t just emotional, it’s biological. According to polyvagal theory (Porges, 2011), when the nervous system doesn’t feel safe, it shifts into survival mode. At night, without daylight or activity to anchor us, our nervous

In a culture that prizes productivity, speed, and instant results, the idea that “slower is faster” can feel counterintuitive, especially when it comes to healing. But if you’ve ever found yourself rushing to feel better, to understand a problem, or to “fix” yourself through sheer willpower, you may have noticed: forcing it often backfires. In therapy and in life, true change rarely happens on a deadline. It happens in the spaces where we slow down enough to feel, to notice,

When anxiety hits, most of us instinctively go straight to our heads. We try to think positive thoughts. We push through the discomfort. We ignore the physical symptoms. We do everything we can to mentally “fix” what’s happening. And while mindset work is certainly important, it's not the full picture, especially when the discomfort lives in the body. Anxiety is not just a mental  state. It’s also deeply physiological. Your body is trying to keep you safe by activating protec

When we grow up in environments where instability is the norm, our nervous systems learn to adapt. In the absence of consistent care or predictable connection, we begin to draw our own conclusions about what love and safety feel like. We may learn, often without words, that intensity means closeness, that emotional unpredictability is just part of being in relationship, and that chaos is how love feels. These patterns are not choices. They are adaptations; ways our nervous sy

There is scientific evidence that supports what many therapists have long witnessed in the therapy room: crying helps us feel better. Dr. William H. Frey, a neuroscientist who dedicated much of his research to understanding tears, found that emotional crying is chemically distinct from other types of tears. It contains stress hormones and toxins, which the body actively works to release through the act of crying. As Dr. Frey writes: “Crying is not only a human response to sor

Many people wake up with a tight chest, racing thoughts or a sense of dread they cannot quite explain. Morning anxiety is more common than we often realise. For some, it passes quickly. For others, it can shape the whole day. If this sounds familiar, it does not mean something is wrong with you. It might simply mean your nervous system is doing what it has learned to do. The good news is, there are simple, supportive ways to meet morning anxiety with care and attention. 1. Re

The concept of the Window of Tolerance  is foundational to trauma recovery work and nervous system regulation. First introduced by Dr. Dan Siegel and widely applied in somatic approaches like Peter Levine’s Somatic Experiencing, this model helps us understand how our mind and body respond to stress, threat, and overwhelm, and how we can come back to a place of calm and connection. At its core, the Window of Tolerance describes the bandwidth in which we function optimally - wh

Have you ever walked away from a distressing experience feeling frustrated with yourself for not speaking up or taking action? Or found that in conflict, you tend to go quiet, shut down, or even go blank? If so, you’re not alone — and importantly, it’s not your fault. What you're experiencing is a natural, automatic reaction from your survival brain. When an event feels overwhelming, your nervous system may activate what's called the freeze response : a primal, instinctive su

When it comes to trauma, many of us think of painful memories, intrusive thoughts, or overwhelming emotions. But as pioneering trauma experts Dr. Peter Levine and Dr. Bessel van der Kolk have shown us, trauma isn’t just stored in the mind — it’s held in the body. Whether from a single distressing event or prolonged periods of stress or neglect, trauma shapes how our nervous system responds to the world. It can leave us stuck in patterns of hyper-vigilance, shutdown, or emotio